Ways to Meet Women Outside of Bars & Clubs
Tired of Bars? No Worries – There Are Better Ways to Meet Women
Whether it's a humble bar, an upscale speakeasy, a pub or a sports bar filled with widescreen TVs, where people drink is often where people meet, flirt and kiss (and sometimes more than that)).
When alcohol lowers people's inhibitions, they start to feel a little more alive and start to feel like things are possible that they might not otherwise do - hence the term "beer goggles. This is great for fostering certain types of connections, but they may not become the connections you really dream of.
For example, if you're the type of person who really likes to connect with someone by sending interesting messages, then a bar isn't a good place to start. If you want to meet people with similar interests, then a club may not be the best place, unless those interests are loud music and dancing.
If you are too young to legally drink, or if you are sober, or if you have many other valid reasons to stay away from such places, you may be asking yourself: How do I meet people outside of bars and clubs?
Well, wonder no more. Here are 9 great ways to do just that:
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Dating Apps
If you're one of the few people who haven't tried online dating yet, now is the time to start.
"There's been a significant growth in dating apps," says Tennesha Wood, dating coach, matchmaker and founder of The Broom List, "which means more singles are using apps that give you more options than ever before. "
There are tons of different apps and sites out there, from generic ones with huge user bases to extremely niche ones, where finding someone who shares your passion will be a breeze. If you're not sure where to start, consider AskMen's Online Dating Center, which contains detailed reviews of hundreds of apps and sites.
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Social Media
If you're wary of dating apps, it's understandable. Presenting yourself to potential partners for judging can be daunting, and if you're not having much success - putting together the right profile is tricky - it can be very exhausting.
Instead, Wood points out that you can use social media as another form of website or app.
"Whatever you do, don't just say 'Hi,'" she notes. "Start a conversation that focuses on what you have in common by asking questions and inserting some humor."
If she doesn't respond, there's no point in bothering someone who isn't interested. However, it's also possible that she's looking for someone to talk to, which could lead to some real flirting if you handle it right.
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Friends
On the other hand, diving headfirst into someone's private messages may not be your style. That's where one of the oldest tricks in the book comes in handy: ask your friends to play matchmaker.
"Your chances of meeting the ideal person are greatest when you meet them through a friend," says Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., psychotherapist and author of "Dr. Romance's Guide to Finding Love Today. "Statistically, most people in successful marriages met their spouse through a friend or family member."
However, it's not necessarily like announcing to all your friends, "I'm single, find me someone!" Wood explains.
"Your friends know women you don't know, but don't assume they know what type of woman you're looking for," she says. "Make it clear to your friends what you're looking for and ask for their help."
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Matchmaker
Sure, maybe you'd prefer to leave matchmaking to the professionals? You may not realize that matchmakers still exist, but they do, and are even experiencing a boom in recent years.
"If you really want to find the right partner, then a matchmaker is a good option," Wood says. "Matchmakers spend a lot of time getting to know their clients and understanding their needs in order to find the right match. [And] one of the biggest advantages of using a matchmaker is the valuable feedback they provide. After the date is over, it can be difficult to determine how your date feels and where they want to take the relationship; a matchmaker will get feedback from your date and provide guidance in areas where you can improve."
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Religious Groups
Sometimes the most knowledgeable matchmaker may be ...... your own God?
If you are religious, it is important for you to find a partner with similar beliefs, and one way to do this is through your own religious community.
"Generally speaking, faith communities consist of people who know each other and can vouch for each other at least to some degree," explains Tessina. "Many people go to church to find connections."
Of course, depending on your level of religious affiliation, this may already be covered in the "Tell Your Friends" section of this article, but if you are a semi-regular visitor to a church, mosque, synagogue or temple, it may be helpful to talk to community leaders about your relationship goals and ask if there are any potential suitable matches.
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Learning Space
If you've heard the term "high school sweethearts" before, you're familiar with the idea that people at the same educational institution as you might be a good match.
These people are usually the same age or close to you; they may have similar backgrounds, similar goals, or some combination of the two, and your friend groups are likely to overlap at least a little.
But even if you've graduated a long time ago, that doesn't mean you can't meet single women in a learning environment again.
Tessina says, "If you can choose what really interests you and attracts the person you're looking for, then you have a good chance of at least making good friends and a good chance of meeting the right person." ".
However, she notes, "Courses and seminars offer a better opportunity to interact with other people than lectures, unless the lecture is a regular event or followed by a lab or discussion in which you can interact with people."
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Work
Similar to school, another place where people date is the workplace. However, this is an issue you have to be careful about, as there is a growing recognition that unnecessary flirtation, romance or sexual attention to co-workers constitutes sexual harassment in the workplace (some companies have policies against co-worker relationships altogether).
Nonetheless, people are naturally attracted to co-workers, and if all goes well, these can develop into serious and lasting relationships.
"The reason so many people meet at work is that it provides the standard for connection: exposure to meaningful content over a long period of time," says Tessina. "Unlike online dating and other disposable venues, The Office gives you the opportunity to really get to know someone and connect with a person before even expressing your interest."
"Working side-by-side with someone every day, seeing them under pressure, empathizing with issues and congratulating them on a victory can give you insight into that person inside and out," she adds.
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Your Neighbors
Like work, a relationship with someone who lives nearby is a high-stakes game that can turn out badly because you have to see your ex regularly - either at work or when you come home with some groceries - both of which hurt You. Unhappy.
However, relationships with neighbors are not impossible, as long as you set the parameters carefully early on. Since small talk is natural among people who live in the neighborhood, it can easily evolve into a more in-depth discussion if both parties are interested.
"Stop outside for a friendly hello, comment on the weather, ask when the trash is being picked up or what day the street sweeper is coming, borrow a cup of sugar, a wrench or lawn mower, or pick up a piece of your neighbor's stuff. sidewalk trash," Tessina suggests. "It's easier in a small town than in a big city because in a small town everyone wants to know everyone else. If you live in a metropolitan area, your neighbors are the other tenants in your apartment or condo building. On the best days, you can meet these neighbors on the roof, by the pool, in the park or near the mailbox."
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Organized Groups
Is there a viable alternative? Join a group, club or society that is related to your interests.
"Already organized, planned activities and structured groups can be very helpful, especially if your circle of friends is too small or too far apart to serve as a resource for meeting new people," notes Tessina. "If you go to an organization's meetings and events for a while, you'll soon make friends there. Most of the people you meet there will be known to others, which makes it easier to know who you're meeting."
It can be anything, she adds. "Are you a collector? Do you have a favorite activity or hobby? Do you like horses, traveling, playing music, dancing, 1930s memorabilia or stamp collecting? Are you interested in model trains, kite flying or model airplanes? Are you an avid skier? Are you an avid skier, gardener or hiker? Do you like to play bridge, chess, computer games? Do you enjoy the intellectual challenges of math, crossword puzzles or astronomy?
"There are groups for all of these interests," says Tessina. "When you find a group centered on your interests that includes people you can date, you're likely to meet someone who already likes you."